“”I’d like to have a screening room. I’d like to have Bush, Cheney and Condoleeza – all of them guys. With the handcuffs and their eyelids open so if they want to fall asleep, they can’t. They have to watch this for four hours.”” – Spike Lee, talking about his “”Clockwork Orange””-esque desire for government officials to be forced to watch his documentary on Hurricane Katrina, “”When the Levees Broke.””

Classic Hanna-Barbara cartoons such as “”Tom and Jerry,”” “”Scooby-Doo”” and “”The Flintstones”” are now being scrupulously watched and edited for questionable material. A complaint to the British media saying that scenes that glamorized smoking were “”not appropriate in a cartoon aimed for children,”” has been the impetus for the editing of cartoons. Get out your VHS tapes of “”Tom and Jerry,”” they’re going to be worth something someday as an example of life before cartoons sucked.

Ishopindie.com is an eclectic web-shop that boasts merchandise similar to that of Urban Outfitters or Anthropologie. The difference is that these items are actually hand-made and entirely unique, not mass-produced. You need not worry about seeing someone wearing the exact same thing as you or writing in the same journal you have. These items are mostly one-of-a-kind limited editions for sensible prices. They carry everything from felt handbags and Scrabble Coasters, to T-shirts that exhibit robots and princesses. Nice combination.

Four is a new alcoholic energy drink whose main selling point is that it contains an herb commonly found in Absinthe, a sometimes-hallucinogenic drink that has been illegal in the United States since 1912. Having seen the pimped-out advertisement cars that resemble Red Bull’s ad campaign, I can only guess that these drinks will be “”accidentally”” distributed to minors on and off campus. Not to mention that stimulants and depressants (i.e. energy drinks and alcohol) are proven to be an unhealthy combination. Binge drinkers will delight in the fact that downing four Fours will most likely give you a heart attack.

These days, idolizing “”The Hoff”” isn’t up to par with Chuck Norris jokes, and this is mostly the fault of The Hoff himself. David Hasselhoff has a music video on YouTube for his “”Jump In My Car,”” a pathetic song liable to dissuade any lingering Hasselhoff fans. He might as well be driving a rapist van and singing “”Get in my van! I’ve got candy!”” It seemed like the girls in the video actually had some sense by brushing off some weird old guy with wavy hair who wants to take them for a ride. This hypothesis was wrong, however, because after The Hoff follows them down the block awhile, one girl finally gives in and joins him, in typical street-corner style. And the amazing finale of the song is the fact that after he finally woos a girl into the passenger seat, he says she lives too far and kicks her out. How very ungentlemanly! Kill some brain cells and watch the video at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_1pDR4gzjo.

Signed to EMI records and a hit in Latin America at the age of 15, JD Natasha is an amazing young adult. She writes and sings all of her songs, and although most of her songs are in Spanish, she will be releasing an English album shortly. Her music has a poppy sound, but the type that will appeal to everyone, not the type that is fake and fleeting. Listen to “”Funny Games”” at http://www.myspace.com/jdnatasha and you’ll be doing a squirmy dance in your computer chair in no time.

Isn’t it lovely when teachers put books on your booklist that you don’t actually need? “”College Rules!”” by Sherrie Nist and Jodi Patrick Holschun was a book on my reading list that I naively bought, thinking that my class would analyze and deconstruct the “”college survival tips”” and examine them closer for social implications or whatnot. I was brutally wrong. The teacher wanted me to use the book, assuming that I was a freshman, which I am not. She told us this in class after I’d already bought the book. Now I am stuck with this book because I haphazardly threw my receipt away and even Bookman’s has rejected owning this piece of literature. The bottom line is that you should go to class before you pick up your books, a lesson I didn’t have to read in a book, but which is probably disputed in the book that taught me this lesson.