America has started 2018 with a lengthy New Year’s resolution list. It will seemingly get longer in oncoming years if we continue with our current performance, but who am I to say. But it’s hard to ignore the news of government officials acting like crazed monkeys fighting with each other while we just sit and watch, until they start throwing poop at us.
I don’t like poop being thrown at me, so what are the best ways to dodge it? Take a step to the side and watch it fly by.
A friend asked me where I thought America would be in 30 years. Only negative concepts came to mind, like George Orwell’s “1984,” episodes from “Black Mirror,” Super Duper Walmarts, overpriced college tuition, or dying from pollution.
Maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to move away from the U.S. and go to another country where hitchhiking is normal and I can have as many pet sheep as I want. From what I’ve heard and read, New Zealand is full of chill people who actually care about one another. The last thing I’m worried about is being that awkward foreigner with no friends.
Some of the best memories I have are from excursions with friends, whether it be camping, hiking, music festivals, road trips, surfing or skiing. But it’s a shame that they don’t happen very often. Friends flake, get too busy, have kids and allow time to control their lives. But in New Zealand, everyone is down to go out and do things.
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Planet D wrote an article on “15 Unique Things to do in New Zealand,” which included Zorbing in Rotorua, hiking along volcanic and acidic lakes and checking out all the scenes where movies were filmed. Naturally it makes sense why people in New Zealand don’t Netflix and chill at home all day, if Mother Nature can do all the work for them. Just bring a blanket and booze.
My absolute favorite thing I learned about New Zealand is how their music festivals cost almost half as much Coachella’s $429 ticket. Not so hard getting your friends together with prices like that.
A quick Google search of “why should I move to New Zealand?” you’ll find an article by the New Zealand Herald in 2016 with the title “70 reasons why New Zealand is the best place in the world.” It gushes over their secluded beaches, amazing seafood and how in a quick drive, New Zealand can be so remote there is no cell phone reception or electricity.
They’re reasonable, resourceful and love their sports. “Our national sporting color is black — great for hiding food/drink stains,” The NZ Herald notes. Even people with no sport enthusiasm can walk around in their favorite black jacket and people will think you’re rooting for the national rugby team. According to last year’s World Happiness Report, New Zealand placed eighth, just behind Canada, while the US placed 14th.
People simply can’t be upset because of New Zealand’s calendar-like backdrops. When you look at New Zealand from outer space, it’s a deep green with long mountain peaks and light blue waters bordering the islands. While over here in the U.S we are super excited to slash millions of acres from national parks to make way for drilling. We enjoy boasting about our industrial success and not feel shameful that we are the second-largest carbon emitter in the world. So we shouldn’t have to agree to the Paris climate deal, said no country ever. Actually, wait. Said the United States.
In 30 years, I can’t imagine our country being in much better shape than it is now. I don’t want to only point fingers on the government, but our lack culture and understanding as well. We are lead by corporate companies bulldozing small business down to bankruptcy.
We have forgotten the eras that lead movements of art and music. I want to avoid all this crap being thrown at me and take a big step to New Zealand.
Sammy Minsk is a senior who slept outside once and declared herself an outdoor extremist since. Follow her on Twitter.