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The Daily Wildcat

The Daily Wildcat


    Jay Leno brings humor to UA Presents on Saturday

    Gary Friedman
    Jay Leno, host of "The Tonight Show," performs his opening monologue at the studio, Jan. 28, 2014 in Burbank, Calif. Jay Leno has hosted the show from 1992 to 2009 and began his second tenure on March 1, 2010 and ends as host of the show on February 6, 2014, ending 22 years as a talk show host. (Gary Friedman/Los Angeles Times/MCT)

    In honor of Jay Leno visiting the UA campus on Saturday, Kevin Reagan compiled some of Leno’s best quotes.

    “Just like [Bill] Clinton, the book will come with a jacket and no pants.” — Jay Leno on former President Bill Clinton’s 2004 autobiography, “My Life.”“I’ll tell you how confident Sarah Palin is: She’s already started writing her inaugural address on her hand.” — Leno on the 2008 vice presidential candidate in 2010.

    “Michelle Obama has made childhood obesity one of her causes. She has started a more intensive program. It’s called 

    ‘Leave No Child With a Bigger Behind.’”

    “It was so cold, Taylor Swift built a snowman, then dumped him and wrote a song about it.”  “Cher has turned down an invitation to sing at the 2014 Olympics in Russia because of Russia’s anti-gay laws. Their anti-gay laws are so strict, men can get arrested just for showing up at a Cher concert.” “Kanye West says he wants to be the ‘Obama of clothing.’ So, he’s designing looks nobody wants and selling them on a site that doesn’t work.”“[Justin] Bieber told police he had consumed alcohol, smoked marijuana and taken prescription drugs. Or as Toronto mayor Rob Ford calls that, a light snack.”“Researchers found a frog in New Guinea that is so tiny, they believe it’s the smallest vertebrate on the planet. It has the tiniest backbone of any living creature, except members of Congress.”

    “A new study found that people who are depressed have a greater risk of stroke. Well, that should cheer them up.”

    “Denmark is charging a fat food tax on cheese, meat and oil. Here, we call that the Denny’s Grand Slam breakfast.”

    Compiled by Kevin C. Reagan


    Follow Kevin C. Reagan on Twitter.

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