Sluttin’ it up at school

Students at the University of Cambridge in the U.K. are having trouble paying their tuition. A lot of trouble. So much so that some students at the prestigious university have resorted to prostitution to pay their school bills. Cambridge’s campus newspaper Varsity interviewed multiple people who reported working as call girls and prostitutes while attending the school, some sleeping with up to seven clients in a night and pulling in œ50 an hour.

But this English collegiate hooker-ery scandal looks like more than just a small problem. Escort site Takemetodinner.com advertises more than 342 Cambridge students available and touts that university girls are classier and pull in more money.

Although this is a sad downturn for Cambridge, at least U.K. students are finally getting to experience what people go through at a second-tier American university like ASU.

Going for two

Throwing a wrench in the gears of Texas’s favorite sport, British sociologist Eric Anderson has churned out a study estimating that one in three males who have played high school football have engaged in sexual conduct with other men. Excluding mock-sexual horseplay and hazing, the conduct ranged from kissing and oral sex to threesomes involving two men and a woman.

Is this any huge surprise? A sport where guys reach between each others legs to hike a ball, wear shiny skin-tight pants and teams have precariously gay sounding names like the Packers, Rams and Bears?

Maybe it’s time America gets over its homophobia and just embraces the fact that football is pretty damn gay.

Kids with guns

If you can hear that faint whining in the distance, it’s the Washington Post drumming up fear that the new Zapper accessory for Nintendo’s Wii video game console might, “”turn tots into trigger-happy warmongers.””

In last Sunday’s Style section, writer Monica Hesse cranked out a puff-piece titled “”Little-Bang Theory of Violence: It All Begins With a Toy-Gun.”” The article refers to the 11-inch long Zapper as a “”snub-nose sub-machine gun”” and hints that the white, plastic toy could lead to murderous rampages and shooting sprees (just what we need, a lecture on violence from a paper that printed 27 editorials in support of invading Iraq).

Quoting fearful parents and juxtaposing them against game-hungry kids, the article failed to mention any legitimate study on the issue outside of a 1968 child care manual by Dr. Benjamin Spock -ÿthe same Benjamin Spock who suggested that babies be placed on their face when sleeping, which resulted in an estimated 50,000 infant deaths between 1958 and 1990.

Of course! Incidents like Columbine were caused by “”Duck Hunt”” and not because parents left automatic weapons accessible to their kids while doctors shoved prescription-strength anti-depressants down their throats. Yeah, must have been “”Duck Hunt.””