Guy: My mom’s too hot – she wouldn’t have sex with you.
Girl: Jay-Z? Yeah, he’s my African lover.
Guy: Man, I wish I had an African lover.
Girl: I know. And he has a really nice body.
Guy: Lucky.
Guy 1: Hey, how was your weekend?
Guy 2: It was all right. My girlfriend broke up with me on Saturday, but yesterday I got like $12 of free food at McDonald’s.
Girl: I just can’t do these math problems … My shirt’s too sparkly.
