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The Daily Wildcat

The Daily Wildcat

COMIC: Rat’s Nest #3
Olivia MoreyFebruary 28, 2024

    Hey, Barkeep

    Alex Guyton
    Alex Guyton / The Daily Wildcat Bartenders Elise Cameron and Kimberly Thomas, a UA alum, pose behind the bar at Bison Witches, home of the Bison Babes.

    Least favorite drink to make?
    Elise: I hate when people come in here with those ridiculous names, like, “Can I have a tic-tac?” I asked, “What’s a tic-tac?” And it’s literally vodka and orange juice, maybe with a splash of grenadine. “So, you want a screwdriver in a shot glass?”
    Kimberly: Hand grenades. You’re dropping glass in glass. It’s bound to break, and then what? We have a lawsuit on our hands?

    What’s your signature drink?
    Kimberly: Bombs. Not your typical “drop-in” bomb. If you order anything with Red Bull and vodka, and you think you’re going to drop it, that’s not happening here. Another signature drink is the Bam. It’s blueberry vodka, Red Bull and a splash of cranberry.
    Elise: You have two or three of those and you’re done.
    Kimberly: Everyone knows when they come here that they’re going to black out because they’ve had at least four bombs.

    Most memorable customer?
    Elise: This guy Gio. He’s been 86’d from The Buffet. He was sitting here the other day, and he’s convinced that he’s part of this important, legendary rock band.
    Kimberly: We usually let him come in, order a drink and we let him stay for about a drink — and then we’re like, “You have to go.”
    Elise: He finished his drink and he kept on having me pet the callouses on his fingers.

    You bartenders put up with so much stuff.
    Elise: Some people have different levels of tolerance. I will tolerate a lot before I kick somebody out, just because I feel so awkward doing it.
    Kimberly: I don’t tolerate shit anymore. I’m like, “What? No. You’re done.”

    As a customer, what can I do to piss you off?
    Kimberly: [Not knowing] what you want. Don’t send me on a wild goose chase four separate times.
    Elise: By the time you’re 21, you should know.
    Kimberly: Maybe we’re such alcoholics we just sit here all day and we know what we want, and we expect other people to know what they want.

    On the flip side, what can I do to make your job as easy as possible?
    Elise: I like it when people ask what I recommend because I know what I like here. “What’s your signature drink? We’re from out of town.” That’s always fun. Kind of help them out.

    Do you get a lot of college students?
    Kimberly: We do. Thursday nights used to be completely insane. We used to be one of the only bars on Fourth Avenue besides O’Malley’s and The Hut, and Maloney’s had a patio. Bison’s pretty original. It has been open almost 20 years.
    Elise: We definitely get that late crowd all the time. It’s so random, like whenever it dies down and you start to clean up on a Saturday night. One o’clock, everybody’s in here.
    Kimberly: I love the “Hey, Barkeep!” column.
    Elise: We read it all the time. We read [the Daily Wildcat] every day.

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