Super Cool News is a new Daily Wildcat feature that shares the, yes, coolest news happening around town and around the country. Try not to take what its writers have to say too literally.
Summer break: A time for relaxation and rejuvenation. The entire school year draws to a close, giving students a chance to regain their mental sanity before the horror begins all over again in August. A chance to spend time with friends, get caught up on the past year’s movie releases and maybe even try out a new hobby.
At least, that’s what summer used to consist of; before we all started the cataclysm known as college. During these supposed best four years of a young person’s life, summers should remain as lazy and gloriously unproductive as ever. However, this often does not occur.
A tragic three letter word has taken its hold in the minds of young students. That word begins with a “J.” Correct, our parents want many of us to get a job, however painful it may sound. The excruciating nature of getting up at the crack of dawn each summer morning to ask people whether they want fries with that or to perform some other grunt work seems like far too spirit-crushing an activity for a poor college student to take part in during the summer. Despite this, the pressure to gain some sort of “work experience” and to make actual “money” prompts students to flock to these positions each and every summer; a true and utter travesty.
“Most of my friends are traveling around the world or relaxing by the pool this summer, but I’ll probably work at some soul-sucking job for most of it,” said a student who wishes to remain anonymous, just in case his future boss ever comes across this article.
However, there exists something even worse than a summer job, a word that every degree-seeking student should cringe at the thought of. You guessed it, many college students take part in an internship over the summer months — a fate far worse than working at your local Walmart.
Internships are supposed to “prepare you for the workforce” and allow you to earn “actual experience in your chosen field” just so you can “someday have an actual career and stop living in your parents’ basement.”
What a bunch of hogwash. To make matters worse, internships often do not even come with a paycheck. They give college students the wonderful chance to sell their summer break to the devil, along with their soul, all while not getting compensated for it.
How much does a student’s soul cost? Apparently nothing.
On top of that, many students choose demanding majors that become difficult to complete in four years, forcing them to take classes during the summer. Yep, they actually have to use their brains during the months of June and July, a thought simply too much to bear.
Instead, try and come up with some sort of an excuse as to why you need to “take the summer off.” Tell your parents you’re looking for a job or an internship, but when nobody seems to want to hire you, go back to spending your summer watching Netflix. If you don’t live in the same city as your parents, maybe you can manage getting a fake job. Or, better yet, tell your parents you will gain “volunteer experience” this summer, that way they won’t ask any questions about why you haven’t received any paychecks.
Putting on the productive summer façade can turn into a lot of work and often requires about as much effort as actually having a productive summer, but that should not give you a reason to give into the pressure.
Of course, getting work experience improves your resume and all that, but what good does an impressive resume do for you if it requires having to sacrifice crazy memories of late-night summer shenanigans in the process. Opportunity costs, people. It’s basic economics.
Keep this in mind, and hopefully you can spend the summer chilling by the pool, avoiding productivity at all costs. You may think, “It’s too late! I already got a job!” or some other travesty. Don’t fret, you still have time to back out. Make sure to do it quickly, otherwise you may become lost in the disheartening world of summer productivity.
Follow Alec Kuehnle on Twitter.
