I just had to ask about your puppy.

Just like the other Corgi guy? There was a guy with a Corgi on Monday. It’s fine, whatever.

So the puppy: How many girls come around trying to love on the puppy?

I left at 4:50 from the UMart. In 10 minutes, I made it to the front of the (Student Union Memorial Center). There were literally people with their iPhones … it was like a photo shoot basically.

So basically, you would suggest getting a puppy for single men?

It would lure people in, but you have to be a person of substance to actually keep them engaged after the puppy gets their attention. If you’re an interesting person, who’s also kind of shy, I would suggest getting a puppy. People want to meet people with puppies.

And some people want to steal puppies.

It’s true. That’s actually why I have the leash. The leash isn’t to stop him from running away, it’s to stop people from taking him.

It was a good choice.

There have been three people who picked my puppy up without asking me. Like, kind of started to move in the opposite direction. I don’t know how I feel about that.

That sounds half dirty. Someone picked your puppy up without asking.

I know; it’s wrong.

What’s your puppy’s name?

Tiberius, named after James T. Kirk.

Is he yours?

Yeah, he’s mine.

How many times have you had him on campus?

I’ve had him on campus, five times, maybe.

And every time you’ve regretted it, because you haven’t been able to get anywhere…

I haven’t been able to get anywhere on time with this dog.

You should just carry him and book it.

You know, I do carry him sometimes, but then even more people stop.

(Girl in background) Oh my gosh.

We’ve been here three minutes and that’s three girls? That’s a good average.

—Colin Darland