Hot dog spends evening in big house
University of Arizona Police Department officers were on patrol in the area of Vine Avenue and First Street on Nov. 1, 2009, at 12:46 a.m. when a man in a hot dog costume jumped out into the street in front of their fully marked police cruiser, extended the middle finger on his left hand toward officers, and screamed, “”Fuck you.””
Officers exited the vehicle and made contact with the man. They asked him for identification and he replied that he did not have any on his person. Officers noticed the strong odor of intoxicants coming from the man’s mouth as he spoke. Police asked the man how old he was and he replied that he was 19. Police then asked the man for his name, which he gave as Michael Joseph Jackson. Police attempted several times to determine the man’s real name and age, but he continued to provide false information. Officers eventually determined who the man was and placed him under arrest. During a search of his person, officers discovered a fictitious California driver’s license.
They cited the man on charges of false reporting to a law enforcement officer, possession of a fake ID and minor in possession. He was transported to Pima County Jail where he was booked.
Soaring roses don’t win hearts
UAPD officers were on patrol in Arizona Stadium on Nov. 21, 2009, at 9:15 p.m. when they observed a man throw a bouquet of roses onto the field. The bouquet struck a woman on the left side of her head, causing a laceration to her forehead. Officers located the individual who had thrown the flowers and made contact with him. They asked him if he knew that he had struck somebody and he stated that he had not meant to.
Officers escorted the man and the woman that he struck into the tunnel underneath the seating areas. They asked the woman if she wished to press charges and she stated that she did not, but she did wish to speak to the man. The man was unapologetic and restated that striking the woman had been an accident. Officers again asked the woman if she wished to press charges. She asked the man what year he was at the university. When he responded that he had already graduated, the woman immediately decided to press charges. The man was cited on charges of assault with minor injury and released on scene.
Woman slapped by bicyclist
A woman reported to UAPD being hit by a man at the intersection of Second Street and Mountain Avenue on Feb. 5 at 8 a.m when she stopped to pick up a newspaper. When she was picking up the paper she was struck in the leg by a bicyclist riding on the sidewalk.
The woman told the bicyclist he should not be riding on the sidewalk, and when she did this he slapped her across the face.
When the man hit the woman, her glasses flew off into the intersection. She described the man as between 18 and 20 years old with dark blonde, shoulder length hair.
The officer reported the woman as having a light red mark on her left cheek. There was no injury to her leg where the bicycle hit her.
The woman said if the man was found, she would like to press charges, but does not think she would be able to identify him.
The woman was told to call the police right away if she saw the man again, but not to confront him.
Creeper’s creepy cleaning
A woman flagged down a UAPD officer on March 17 at 5:15 p.m. at the U-Mart in the Student Union Memorial Center.
The woman was in a wheelchair and told the officer that earlier in the day, at 2:45 p.m., she was leaving a bathroom and was approached by a man who asked, “”Can I help you?””
The woman said the man walked her to the Starbucks inside the UA Bookstor e and bought her a coffee.
The man then walked her to her residence hall and entered the hall with her. He also followed her to her room on the first floor and went inside with her.
Once inside the room, the man told the woman her pants were dirty — that she should change them.
She went inside the bathroom to change her pants, and the man followed her inside. She told him to get out of the bathroom, and he did.
When she got out of the bathroom, she tried to tidy her room because it was messy and started to pick up clothing items as well.
The woman reported becoming uncomfortable and wanting the man to leave but didn’t know how to ask him.
The man told the woman that her shirt was dirty and she should change that too. When she took her hat off, the man said her hair was dirty and asked her if he could wash it for her. She told him “”No.””
He then said, “”Your face is dirty, I’ll wash it for you.”” The woman said she would do it herself, and after wiping her face off with a cloth, she handed it to him to throw away, and he began wiping her face with it.
The woman said she was uncomfortable and told the man that she had to go.
The man walked with her and told her that he had seen her around campus before and was a graduate student.
The police officer told the woman that if she sees the man again, she should call UAPD immediately.
Man poops pants to resist arrest
A UAPD officer performed a traffic stop on March 24 at 9:57 p.m. after a random registration check showed the car owner had a warrant from Tucson Police Department.
When the officer pulled the car over, the driver got out and started walking toward the officer.
The officer asked the man for identification and he walked back to the driver’s seat, got in the car, sat down and said that he would not give his information and that he did not recognize “”illegal government authority.””
The officer told the man that if he did not give his information he would be arrested. The man became upset and threw his car keys onto the floorboard. He then gave the officer a paper, saying it was an international driver’s license from the Pembina Indian Tribe of North Dakota.
As the officer was doing a records check on the license, the man shut the car door and locked both the driver’s side and passenger side doors.
The records check showed that the license was suspended and there was a warrant for his arrest from TPD.
Another UAPD officer arrived to the scene and both officers tried to convince the man to unlock the doors and get out of the car.
The officer was able to open the passenger side door and the man said he understood he was under arrest, but would not assist the officers in his own arrest.
Once the driver side door was unlocked the man went limp and said that he would have to be carried out of the car.
The man was taken from the car, handcuffed and carried to the patrol car.
On the way to the Pima County Jail, the officer could smell an odor coming from the backseat and rolled down his window.
The man began to laugh when he rolled the window down and said he knew what the smell was. He told the officer that he defecated in his pants “”as an added surprise”” for the officer and “”to further show it as a means of resistance for being arrested.””
When they arrived to the jail the man said he would not walk into the jail and it would be an embarrassment for him to be placed in jail after defecating on himself.
The jail staff was able to convince the man to walk into the jail and he said that he could not believe he was assisting his own arrest.
The man was booked into the jail for the suspended license and the warrant. His car was impounded.
Paper airplane almost causes car crash
A UAPD officer was on patrol on Speedway Boulevard on April 7 at 11:30 p.m. when he noticed three men and a woman standing by the bus stop at 4055 E. Speedway Blvd. As the officer drove near the bus stop, one of the men took a couple steps toward the road and threw an orange object at the windshield of the patrol car.
The officer reported that the object hit the windshield and rolled over the top of the vehicle. There was also another car immediately next to his in the middle lane and pedestrians near where the object hit.
The officer turned the patrol around, and, as he got out of the car to speak with the man, the man started yelling, “”Oh, man that was stupid, I really fucked up and shouldn’t have thrown that at you. I guess I could have caused an accident.””
The officer asked the man if he knew he was throwing the object at a police car, and he said that he didn’t know because the police SUV does not look like a “”normal”” police car.
The officer got the object from the street and saw that it was a piece of paper folded into the shape of an airplane.
The officer could also smell alcohol on the man and noticed slurred speech. The man said he drank 10 beers at a bar near his home.
He also stated that he got the piece of paper from the Lucky Strike bowling alley at 4025 E. Speedway Blvd. and then folded into an airplane. He kept telling the officer that he didn’t know he was throwing anything at a police car and that what he did was stupid and unsafe.
The man was arrested for criminal littering for throwing trash into a public roadway and criminal nuisance for recklessly creating a condition that endangered the safety of others.
The man was cited and released on scene, and a taxi was called for the group.