What is your favorite drink to make?
TJ: There’s this drink I really like to make, but it kind of has a bad name.
Alex: Mine, too. We’ve run like “double-sided dildos” and all that fun stuff.
TJ: I really like to make a “Tastes Like Pussy.”
Alex: That’s what I was going to say! I like making white gummy bears; those are fun. … “Tastes like pussy” is a lot more fun, though. That’s probably my shot of choice.
On the flip side, least favorite drink to make?
TJ: Definitely a mojito, or anything that involves muddling.
Alex: Yeah, I was going to say an Old Fashioned.
TJ: Anything that takes a lot of time, especially when we’re really busy.
Weirdest, strangest thing you’ve seen go down at the bar?
TJ: I did have a girl make out with my hand one time. That was pretty interesting.
Alex: Oooh.
TJ: She just grabbed it, introduced herself, then just started kissing it and holding on to it.
Most memorable customer?
TJ: I had this guy that just kept ordering Kansas City Ice Waters and would tip me $5 on each one, so that was pretty cool.
Alex: This customer gave Sylvia $100 for giving him a piece of gum.
TJ: Oh, you know what? The guy that made it rain last weekend.
Alex: Yeah, for sure.
TJ: Grabbed a wad of ones and just threw it at us.
Alex: Hundreds.
Is Hi Fi known for any specialties?
Alex: I’d definitely say the milkshakes.
TJ: We have our list, and then we have a specialty one every month.
What’s September’s?
TJ: September’s is a caramel kiss. It’s pretty good.
Alex: It’s really good.
What’s in that?
TJ: You’ve got Kahlua, Smirnoff [Kissed] Caramel, vodka, Heath chips, a little bit of caramel in it, and then our low-fat vanilla soft serve.
What is something a customer can do to piss you off?
TJ: Whistle.
Alex: I think when I’m asking for payment and they don’t want to give it to me.
TJ: Or they forget that they have to pay.
Alex: Or when they give me ATM cards and then walk away.
Something that a customer does that makes your job easier?
Alex: Have their money ready, know what they want to order — same for you?
TJ: Yeah, I’d probably say that. I mean, tipping well is always nice, too.
Alex: For sure.
—Follow Alex Guyton @GuyTonAlexAnder
