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The Daily Wildcat

The Daily Wildcat

 

Pop culture shows how not to love

It has been reported that Chris Brown is asking to have a restraining order against him from Rihanna relaxed. Let us recall last year’s events of a brutally contused pop star and one of the greatest heartbreaks known to man. A year later, it’s Grammy season and C. Breezy thinks it’s time for the order to be dropped, so he can attend the award show where the crime took place.

I am praying that the phrase “”forgive but never forget”” will not be considered in Brown’s request.

Pop culture fanatics around the globe, myself included, were shocked to hear that Rihanna took Brown back again. Plain and simple: she loved the way he lied. Lied, hit, beat up, punched, whatever you want to call it, this was an unhealthy relationship. However, it seems that Rihanna is not the “”only girl in the world”” who has been infected with the sickness of love.

The more I listen to my friends and peers complain about their significant others, the more I find myself muttering under my breath, “”Why are you even in the relationship?””

Although surveys from the Bureau of Justice have revealed significant decreases in domestic temper tantrums and dating violence among young people, this does not mean that every current relationship has a storybook ending. Poisonous relationships do still exist. They remain an incredibly serious issue among members of our generation, who tend to live vicariously through pop culture icons.  

In the year 2010 alone, I can think of three unhealthy relationships that were spotlighted in pop culture. Millions of viewers watched as Scott Disick, of “”Keeping Up With the Kardashians,”” violently bashed his hand into a wall, releasing relationship tension. Then there were the infamous Mel Gibson/Oksana recordings in which Gibson suggested Oksana deserved to be beaten. And lastly, the world saw how Rihanna went from yodeling about umbrellas in ballet shoes to harmonizing extremely masochistic lyrics.

Despite who literally wears the pants, men in relationships can be just as easily abused as women. As women, we tend to be more public about our problems. And, admittedly, people enjoy a good scandal. See the tabloids. However, men just as susceptible to domestic abuse as women. Their drama just isn’t broadcast in gossip magazines or on Perez Hilton’s blog. When was the last time a movie about a man being victimized in a relationship was shown on Lifetime? “”Unhealthy relationship”” does not have a connotative definition of “”girlfriend who is mean to boyfriend.”” Here’s a shout out to the boyfriend emotionally, verbally or physically neglected by their woman.  

The key ingredients to a love potion are a poisonous combination of adrenaline, dopamine, and serotonin. Masochistic or not, unhealthy relationships are literally sick. When relationships become toxic, these chemicals become imbalanced and cause people to do crazy things. Cussing out a boyfriend or girlfriend is not healthy.

Fighting and arguing are essential to relationships, they keep the flame lit, but there is a big difference between what is love and baby don’t hurt me, no more.

On a more serious note, I have seen and experienced couples whose happiness feels contagious. While you’re looking for romance this Valentine’s season, keep in mind that relationships should make life more enjoyable, not the contrary.

In the meantime, I will keep my fingers crossed in hopes that Brown’s Grammy will be accepted by someone legally allowed to be in the presence of our favorite Barbadian superstar.

— Caroline Nachazel is a sophomore majoring in journalism and communication. She can be reached at letters@wildcat.arizona.edu.

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