There was a time, once, when “Jersey Shore” had an enjoyable novelty to it and was loveable — that was three seasons ago.
In a TV age where “reality” shows are far too popular, the Jersey Shore became a quick king among the rest. It is the highest rated show ever produced by MTV, and there was a point when that was justified.
The original season of the “Shore” was the guiltiest of guilty pleasures, because most people enjoyed watching eight loud, borderline alcoholic, sex-crazed, regularly crazed strangers spending a summer together.
There was a dynamic sense to the show, because nobody knew the stereotypes each character represented. Nobody knew that Mike “The Situation” was a robbery-pulling, player-hating, self-proclaimed player. Who would have guessed that drunk girl, Snooki, would turn out to be a meatball with a heart of gold and a brain of mush. Most of all, who would have known that Ronnie and Sammi would cause all that drama?
Finishing its fourth season, everything is now predictable. The world knows that Mike is going to be a two-faced dick, Deena and Snooki are going to be way too drunk, and Ron and Sam will fight every episode. Any surprise left is slightly held up by the writers making Snooks and “The Situation” fight instead.
Even the only characters to remain likeable throughout the whole series, Pauly D and Vinny, are starting to get old.
Either way, sending them to Italy didn’t change a damn thing: They still go the club and get drunk. The guys still try to pick up chicks to hit and quit. The girls still make fools of themselves and flash their cookas to the world.
But, because MTV is a money-hungry monster willing to devour every last ounce of revenue from a tired show, it’s not ending any time soon.
Right now there is at least one more Seaside season scheduled, which undoubtedly will be the worst yet. Maybe after season seven, when some of the “Shore” stars are pushing their upper 30s, the series will see its end.
Of course, it doesn’t have to. There’s an easy fix MTV is avoiding — an entirely new cast. Just turn it into the next “Real World,” but with louder faux Italians.
It’s sad to say, but in this incarnation, there’s nothing left to love about the “Jersey Shore.” It’s a shell of its former self, the last vestiges of which are utterly hateable.
— Jason Krell is a junior studying creative writing and Italian. He can be reached at arts@wildcat.arizona.edu.
