Guy McFakenamerson

While we would not normally give criminal advice, here’s a tip for future conmen: When the police ask for your identity, do not give them a name that sounds like a rejected Marvel comic book character.

University of Arizona Police Department officers were patrolling the east side of campus in search of a man reported to be peering into car windows and pulling on their door handles on Aug. 7 at around 12:15 p.m. 

At around 1 p.m., the Tucson Police Department reported a man matching the same description of the person UAPD was looking for also pulling on handles.

A UAPD officer was searching the area around Campbell Avenue near Sixth Street when he spotted a man who matched the description. He drove up to the man and asked to speak with him.

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He asked the officer “What now?” to which the officer responded that he matched the description of a man reported acting suspiciously around vehicles. 

The man said that the cars belonged to his friends. When the officer questioned him further, the man told him that he was harassing him and that the officer should talk to the man’s lawyer.

The man said that his name was “Steve Stevenson.” However, the officer remembered that the first name of the suspect was something else, obtained from earlier in the day when the man made a call to UAPD using a blue light telephone to report people following him.

The officer pressed him on the issue, but the man swore his real identity was “Steve Stevenson.” He reminded the man that providing a false name to a police officer while being lawfully detained was illegal. The man finally admitted that he was not “Steve Stevenson” and gave the officer his real name, which matched the name of the suspect.

Based on the multiple reports of the man’s suspicious activity around cars and his initial refusal to provide his real identity, the officer issued him a six month exclusionary order from campus and all other UA-owned property.

Gone in a Puff of Smoke

It is not a great showcase of street-smarts to get into a street race with a cop on a Tuesday night.

A UAPD officer was stopped at a red light at the intersection of Campbell Avenue and Broadway Boulevard when a silver Sedan pulled up next to his car at around 11:30 p.m. on Aug. 6. 

When the light turned green, the car quickly drove away down Campbell Avenue and the officer increased his speed to match the sedan’s speed. 

After driving past 13th Street, the officer noticed that he was going 63 mph. He switched on the car’s emergency light to indicate to the driver that he intended to pull him over for a traffic stop.

When the driver pulled his car over near 15th Street, the passenger jumped out and took off running up the street. The officer alerted dispatch to the runaway passenger and gave a description of the man.

He ordered the driver out of the car. Once out, the officer frisked him and handcuffed him. He also questioned the driver about the passengers, but the driver said he did not really know the man, but that they had been hanging around several of the driver’s friends and that the driver was supposed to drop him off.

While standing near the car, the officer smelled the scent of recently smoked marijuana. Upon questioning, the driver admitted that there was a small amount of marijuana in the car, which the driver found, along with a lighter, a marijuana shake and a black and red bong with residue on it.

The officer also found a cell phone on the ground near where the passenger had bolted from the car. He collected it as evidence.

Another officer took the driver to the Pima County Jail where he was charged with possession of marijuana, possession of drug paraphernalia, speeding and driving on a suspended license.

UAPD officers searched the area for the escaped passenger. They discovered a loaded Smith & Wesson handgun in the area where the passenger was last seen running, but did not locate the man.

Flag on the play

Football may be a contact sport, but checking in football players for practice should not be.

UAPD officers met with the recruitment intern who reported the incident on Aug. 7. She told the officers that the day before, Aug. 6, at around 6 p.m., she had been posted at the north door of the Cole and Jeannie Davis Sports Facility.

While checking football players in, a man she did not recognize walked up to her and said that he wanted to enter the facility. She told him that this was not allowed. 

The man reached out and grabbed the intern’s left arm. The intern told officers that he squeezed her arm with enough force to worry her, though he was not expressly holding her in place. 

She told him to “get your hands off” of her and he immediately let go. He then walked away, going south.

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After he left, the intern told the football assistant director about the incident so that staff could know and modify the process for checking in players. 

The intern gave the officers a description of the man but could not remember many distinguishing characteristics. 

Officers searched the area around the facility and noticed a few cameras that could have caught images of the man. The intern told them that the assistant director said he would be “looking into” the footage from these cameras.

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