Coffee Talk with Kyra Williams.

The Wildcat caught up with philosophy senior Kyra Williams drinking a tea outside of Starbucks on University Boulevard, where she works.

Wildcat: If you could take a bath in soup, what kind of soup would it be?

Kyra Williams: Right now, chicken noodle because I’m sick.

W: Would you use one of the noodles as a play toy, like a rubber ducky?

KW: Yeah. Like a sponge or something.

W: Have you ever had matzoh ball soup? I would climb inside the matzoh ball. It probably would be hard to breathe, but it would definitely feel like a big sponge bath. If you could immerse yourself in coffee, what kind of coffee would it be?

KW: It would probably be a Coffee Misto, steamed milk and coffee.

W: Why would you choose that?

KW: It’s a perfect combination, not too much coffee, not too much milk.

W: It wouldn’t get you too caffeinated. Because I’m sure if you were immersing yourself, it could seep into your skin and you’d be on edge for five days. It’d be like doing 30 lines of coke. If you could go mountain climbing on an ice sculpture, what kind of ice sculpture would it be?

KW: I’d have to say a swan.

W: What part would you set up camp at?

KW: Probably on its back. Because it’s flat there.

W: Would you feel bad putting your sticks in there so you could get up there? Ruining a work of art…

KW: That’s kinda, yeah, I’d feel bad about that I guess.

W: You should feel bad. If you were in Ketchikan, Alaska in the wilderness and you could use a burrito as a sleeping bag to protect you from the cold and the ferocious bears, what kind of burrito would it be?

KW: A California burrito from Viva.

W: Those are so disgusting. Are those the ones with the French fries?

KW: No, they have steak and potatoes and tomato and onion. They’re so good.

W: But are the potatoes in the form of a French fry?

KW: No, they’re chunky.

W: Last question. What Johnny Depp character would you be?

KW: I guess everybody probably says the pirate, huh.

W: I’ve only asked 20 people that today.

KW: I’d have to say the pirate character because I like pirates.

W: Does he jump off of any buildings? They should have something where that guy goes to New York City in the ’50s. It would be like an art-movie-slash-dramedy.

KW: Yeah, that would be kind of cool.

W: And he could just do his one-liners to taxi drivers and people on horses and stuff. It could be amazing. Can I take your mug?

KW: (Picks up her tea, looks confused.)

W: No, your picture.

– Andi Berlin