Call of Duty
Say goodbye to your kill/death ratio, but be prepared for a sloppy laugh riot. Playing any version of “Call of Duty” while your hand-eye coordination and reflexes are at an all-time low makes for some great memories. Add a headset to the mix, toss in copious amounts of belligerent shit-talking, and you’re golden, Ponyboy.
When berating 12 year-olds via Xbox Live, your number one priority should be talking up your skills, which should be atrocious at the moment, while degrading everyone else in the game lobby — including your teammates — for the most miniscule reasons possible. Use the anonymity to its fullest.
Next, prepare to die a lot, often in quick succession without having realized you respawned in the first place. Don’t let up with the boasts though, as it’s important to distract everyone with your hilarious jokes. Think Dane Cook with the reaction time of a baby sloth.
Last, prepare for the emotional valley after riding high, because eventually all the dying gets frustrating, and in your drunken state you can’t cope. So you rage into the microphone and scare the hell out of everyone you’re playing with, or at least make their ears bleed. Granted, this is more hilarious for your friends, but laughs are laughs.
As an alternative, play “Nazi Zombies” and scream forever as even the slowest zombies kill you repeatedly.
Mario Kart
Driving while intoxicated is incredibly stupid and dangerous, unless of course it’s through Mushroom Kingdom. No, that’s not a reference to psychedelics — it’s a reference to the classic Nintendo video game “Mario Kart”, which is best played when you add alcohol. Don your beer goggles and finally see what the creators of the game were thinking when they put a dinosaur, a mushroom man and a gorilla behind the wheel of a go-cart. Racing around the vibrant world of “Mario Kart” can be quite difficult when you’re seeing double Yoshis, and you may find yourself losing race after race. Don’t worry though, getting trashed with your friends and launching turtle shells at one another is more than gratifying. One word of advice is while you may remember Rainbow Road fondly, stay away from that level in this liquored up version of the game — it’s damn near impossible.
Flower
What would you do if you were a gust of wind in a beautiful, grassy field of hills? This is the premise of “Flower.” One of a few video games starting to leave the basic puzzle-challenge aspect of gaming, “Flower” dives into the pure art realm, leaving the gamer to define his or her own experience. In this game, you control a gust of wind, at first blowing around a single flower petal. As the petal blows by other colorful flowers, more petals join the air, and beautiful mixes of colors are created. There’s no narrative, other than the beginning, which features a potted flower sitting in a city apartment, almost seeming to dream of a time when nature was dominant. The visual effect makes for an unbelievably vibrant visual experience.
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