Let’s talk about plastic surgery. What are your thoughts on that?

Um, I think if it makes someone feel better about themselves it’s OK.

Regardless that they’re changing the body that God gave them and all that other stuff?

Um (pauses) yeah.

But can’t people find a cheaper way to feel better about themselves than going through surgery?

Yeah, but I think if it’s like (pauses) like I think that if someone thinks that’s what’s going to make them happy, it’s not OK because then there’s something wrong with them, but if it’s just like, you know, there’s like a bump on my nose or something, I’d really be more comfortable with that.

So to you it’s more about the cosmetic stuff, like liposuction, do you think that’s wrong?

Yeah. Well I think if you’re to the point where it’s like, um, a health problem then you should do whatever you can to be healthy.

Whatever happened to just diet and exercise?

Well sometimes you’re like too far, but if you’re just looking for a quick fix then it’s better to do the surgery.

Have you ever considered any plastic surgery or anything like that?

No, no.

Is it because going under the knife is scary or it’s just not your deal?

I’ve never considered it.

OK, because I read this story that apparently a former Argentine beauty queen died from complications during a butt implant surgery. Did you hear about that?

No, I didn’t.

Is getting butt implants that important?

No. (Laughs) at least I don’t think so.

If you’re a former beauty queen why would you even do that in the first place? I mean, people already know you’re hot.

(Pauses) Probably just because the world she was in and she never felt good enough. I don’t know.

The whole butt surgery thing blew my mind. What do you think is the weirdest cosmetic surgery out there?

Um (pauses) I think it’s weird when everyone puts the stuff in their lips. The collagen.

— Brian Kimball