So you’ve made it to college and you’re ready to party. Not to be a buzz-kill, but take it easy.
Yes, college is about having new experiences and getting a little crazier than you would back home. However, the fact of the matter is that a failure to be safe during parties could very easily result in humiliation, bodily damage or even an untimely death. Those stories you heard about college kids dying — they’re real, and you should probably think about your actions before you chug yourself to death. Here are some tips to keep you alive at the party.
Learn your limits
It’s tempting to think that you’re the best drinker in the world. However, unless you’re 300 pounds and have an ox’s liver, the small tolerance to alcohol you built up in high school isn’t going to do much good. Take those first parties easy and try drinking slowly. This will let the alcohol level in your bloodstream build up without any nasty surprises. If you wake up the next morning with new memories of laughing it up with your friends, you did OK. If you wake up on the roof of the Student Union Memorial Center in a puddle of your own vomit with no memories at all, you should probably go lighter. Three or four drinks should be fine for one fun night, but everyone has a different body. Test the waters.
Never take pills from strangers
Watch out for pills. Most of the time, no one is going to be handing out drugs for free. However, should drugs be your scene, the worst choice you can make is to take a pill without knowing what’s in it. Sure, the guy wearing the Insane Clown Posse shirt on the couch might seem relaxed and cool, but just because he says he’s giving you ecstasy doesn’t mean that’s what you’ll get. Unlike marijuana, ecstasy is usually cut with something like heroin, speed or other amphetamine analogues. Even though it might be color-coded, you’re still just throwing a capsule full of powder down your throat. As for pills that aren’t ecstasy — prescription drugs or otherwise — you should stay away from them. Just remember the saying, “If it grows in the ground, it’s probably OK.”
Don’t take anything from strangers, actually
Don’t be the person to take the roofie. If someone offers you a drink, stew up a nice excuse from the brain vat. Yeah, maybe he or she is just being nice and hitting on you, but as Alfred said, “Some men just want to watch the world burn.” In parties, that can translate to people drugging their peers for fun. And it’s not just roofies — getting dosed with LSD wouldn’t exactly be a peaceful, loving time if you didn’t know you took it. In fact, you could end up in a hellish nightmare like Hunter S. Thompson described, with your “dead grandmother crawling up your leg with a knife in her teeth.” There’s no such thing as a free lunch, so don’t think taking free drinks will come without a price.
Don’t walk home alone
Campus and the surrounding neighborhoods are generally safe places to be. However, when it’s past midnight and you’re drunk, it’s best to have one or more friends with you. Not only is it more fun to walk home with your drunken buds, but you’re less likely to be the target of a mugger or a violent maniac if you’re in a group. And yes, people have been mugged, beaten raped and shot on and near campus. If you don’t have a group to go home with you, stay in well-lit areas and carry a can of mace. Or, to be even safer, phone a friend to give you a ride back. You can pay your friend back by offering to buy them a scrumptious breakfast burrito from Taco Shop.
