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The Daily Wildcat

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The Daily Wildcat

The Daily Wildcat


    “On the spot: Jeff Gluck, engineering freshman”

    So I have a hypothetical question for you that could go many different directions, let’s see which way you take it. You have 24 hours to live and you know you’ll die, you just don’t know how. What are you going to do?

    (Pause) Um, I have no idea.

    Well would you try and do anything illegal? I mean, it’s not like they can put you away for life in prison or anything.

    (Laughs) Well, I wouldn’t do anything super illegal. I wouldn’t hurt anyone or anything like that, I would just go around and do whatever I wanted and have fun.

    There’s nothing specific that you want to check off your ol’ bucket list? Or what about robbing a bank or something like that?

    No. At the very last second I’d jump off of something very, very high. (Laughs)

    But what about something a little more outrageous. You wouldn’t go stalk Jennifer Aniston or anything like that to try and get a glimpse of the goods before you go?

    (Laughs) I don’t know.

    I mean, you’ve only got one day left to live. What are they going to do to you if you get caught?

    (Laughs) Nah, I wouldn’t be a creep about it.

    But what would it matter if you’re not going to be there tomorrow?

    You’ve got to die with dignity. I can’t mess that up.

    Yeah, that’s a good point. But what if they told you that you were going to go to hell anyway? Then it wouldn’t really matter what you did and then, as you said, you could do something “”super illegal”” and it wouldn’t really matter that much, right?

    (Laughs) I guess so. I’d probably just go drive across the country as fast as I could at like 200 miles an hour. I don’t know. Maybe I’d steal a really nice car.

    OK, at least you’d get into some mischief. That would be weird if you were such a law-abiding dying person.

    Yeah, I guess I’d do what I can.


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