My capacity for responding to text messages is shrinking rapidly. On an average day, I receive anywhere between 30 and 100 text message notifications. Apparently, that might be a low number: a study from 2023 suggested that over half of American teens field at least 237 text messages a day.

While I might be receiving fewer text messages than these teens, I’m certainly still receiving far too many. I’m in group chats for both of my jobs, certain group activities or interests, friend groups and for my family. I receive GIFs, memes, reactions, videos of tractors, scams, motivational quotes, Spotify song links, two-factor authentications, life updates, rants, scheduling reminders and article links. 

I would say that at least half of those texts are completely unnecessary. 

To start with, we can stop reacting to messages unless there is a dire need to confirm receipt. Did someone text you that they need to cancel an engagement with you at the last minute? You have permission to respond or react to that message. Did someone in a group chat make a joke? Let one person reply and move on. Nobody needs or wants to receive 10 “haha”’ text message reaction notifications. 

We can also stop sending videos, memes, GIFs or other content pulled from the internet. No, I do not need to be sent that TikTok recipe unless we talked about it in-person and I asked for it explicitly. We can stop double texting and start proofreading the first message to ensure that it includes all the necessary information. We can stop having entire, full-blown conversations over text.

I could write pages of this. Texting etiquette matters.

My enlightenment to this etiquette came slowly and recently though. I noticed that people that I love and who are important to me were not receiving replies to their messages, because I was so overwhelmed with the level of texting engagement required of me throughout the day with all the other tasks I have on my plate. It is also a new concept that we have such unlimited access to those in our lives 24/7, so texting can easily overwhelm us. 

In a survey of 1,000 texters from 2025, over 82% of all consumers (and 90% of Gen Zers) claimed that they check their text message notifications within 5 minutes of receipt. Texting was also a primary daily mobile activity for 83% of the participants, while activities such as using social media or checking email fell to the wayside. It seems like texting wins the smartphone game, hands down.

All in all, one might conclude from this data that I am not the only one who maintains a high level of texting engagement. Whether or not these same users feel overwhelmed by the number of texts they receive is unclear. However, it does seem like calling or hearing someone’s voice creates potential for stronger social bonds in a way that text-based communication does not.

It can be hard to call people, though — another attitude that is perhaps reflected in the stats: one survey from 2024 showed that 49% of youth aged 18-24 preferred text messaging to communicate with friends and family, compared to 28% opting for some kind of call. 

Personally, while hearing someone’s voice might be better for forming social bonds, the stress I associate with phone calls usually wins out, leading me to continue breaking my own texting rules all the time. My personal goal is to replace a text message with a phone call at least once a week. If I’m thinking of someone and want to check in, I can give them a ring and have a short conversation or just leave a little message. 

I encourage you to reflect critically on your texting habits as well. What is the purpose of the message? Is a text really the best format for communicating that message? Over time, maybe you will find that instead of sending your life update via text, you should send an email or even a letter. Or you will come to the conclusion that you don’t need to make a Dad joke in a group chat with 10 other people — because it will likely not be the joke that makes someone’s day, and because it would be so much better to make that joke in person. Perhaps you will even consider saving your rants and daily frustrations for in-person conversations, where you will not only receive an immediate response, but you will also be able to express yourself more fully and directly. 

You too can do good in the world, one unsent text message at a time.

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Fiona Sievert is an undergraduate at the University of Arizona double majoring in Anthropology and East Asian Studies with a minor in German Studies. She loves languages, wearing funky outfits, and (occasionally) being a dirtbag in the great outdoors!