It’s 8 p.m., and you’re poor. You don’t know how many more programs in the basement you can drag yourself to just to score some free pizza. Not to mention you aren’t sure how many more cups of Easy Mac you can nab from your neighbors whose parents have loaded them up with enough food to last until the next Cold War.

There are only so many times you can eat at Panda Express before enough is enough. (Although I’ll admit the orange chicken and rice got me through many a late study night freshman year.)

If you want some guidance, David Drew Pinsky (also known as Dr. Drew) — yes, “Celebrity Rehab,” “Celebrity Fit Club,” “Teen Mom” reunion shows Dr. Drew — highlights his “lifechanger” Registered Dietitian Rachel Beller, about what to nosh on to avoid that Freshman 15.

Here’s her list: cereal, almond milk, salad bags, cans and pouches of tuna or salmon, frozen veggies, fruits, cinnamon, dark chocolate squares, frozen turkey, chicken, salmon or veggie burgers, and Greek yogurt.

There’s no problem with the list — it’s all healthy and good for you and what not — but I don’t always have the budget or the time to shop at Trader Joe’s to get my weekly almond milk fix.

Here are my lazy man’s suggestions on how to cash in that meal plan money and still not have to head to the Tucson Mall to get the next size up in your super cute, fire-engine red silk dress from Forever 21 — perfect for the next “Heaven and Hell” party.

A quick run through the Cactus Grill line on the third floor of the Student Union Memorial Center before that morning class doesn’t have to include a massive breakfast burrito. (I know, even I sometimes have to resist the urge.)

A three-egg omelet only has 90 calories, and 18 grams of protein. Lots of brain food, just like your mom always tried to get you to eat at home.

After trying to switch out of that 1,000-person astronomy class or decipher your notes from Spanish 102, a Stradiberrious smoothie at IQ Fresh, 142 calories, and a Caesar wrap, 429 calories, won’t break your calorie bank either.

Even dinner of a serving of whole wheat pasta with marinara sauce is only 270 calories at Three Cheeses and a Noodle. Add a Caesar salad and it only adds 39 more calories.

So although I appreciate Dr. Drew trying to save lives, he has to realize something. There are just too many parties to plan and mid-term exams to cram for us to always be breaking out the salmon burgers with Greek yogurt and fresh fruit. At least in college anyway. I’ll use that list once my weeks aren’t so full of anthropology papers to write and movie nights with friends who just came back from a summer in Germany to plan.